Left to my own (deeply irresponsible) devices, I would cheerfully fill each submission for this column with an almost belligerent degree of whimsy. Perhaps some kind of opening that aimlessly ponders whether it would be better to exchange my human hands for bear fists or the massive faces of some furious bees.
Truthfully, such is my casual regard for disciplined writing, I pretty much do this sort of nonsense for most of my Drum columns. All of them, in fact.
Which is why when I’m at the day job, nudging the alphabet around the page for marketing purposes, I find myself mumbling a very useful mantra – ‘kill your darlings’.
Attributed to everyone from Faulkner and Chekov to Jeff from Byker Grove, it’s a piece of literary advice that essentially means to recognise in your writing the things you love to write and ruthlessly strip them away.
As advice goes it isn’t especially fun. Writing, both artistic and commercial, is often a profession sought out by those with a very particular sense of prose.
